Start With the Relationship
Disagreement and frustration can be normal parts of team life. Bullying is different: it involves repeated harmful behavior, a power imbalance, and difficulty for the targeted child to make it stop.
Parents should avoid both extremes—assuming every conflict is bullying or dismissing repeated harm as something children must simply toughen through.
What You Can Do This Week
- Listen and document specific incidents, dates, witnesses, and impact.
- Review the organization’s conduct and reporting policies.
- Report safety concerns through the appropriate adult channel.
- Support your child’s connections and identity outside the team.
Helpful Conversation Starters
- Try: “Can you tell me exactly what happened and what happened next?”
- Try: “Has this occurred more than once, and do you feel able to make it stop?”
- Try: “Which adult at the program feels safest to talk to?”
These prompts are intentionally open-ended. Ask one, then leave enough quiet space for your child to answer without being corrected, coached, or rushed.
Signs That More Support May Be Needed
- Repeated humiliation, threats, exclusion, hazing, or targeted harassment.
- Retaliation after a child reports a concern.
- Sudden avoidance, missing belongings, injuries, or major emotional changes.
One difficult day is normal. A repeated pattern across several weeks deserves a calm conversation with your child and, when appropriate, their coach, school counsellor, physician, or another qualified professional.
The Parent's Role
Participation should never require accepting abuse. Act calmly, document carefully, and keep the child’s safety and dignity above competitive consequences.
You do not need to have every answer. Your most valuable contribution is being a steady adult who listens, protects perspective, and reminds your child that their worth never depends on a roster spot, statistic, or final score.